Frank Part 1
Frank Part 2
"Whoa," said Kim.
"Whoa," said Clark.
"Ow," said Frank as he pulled a wayward nail out of his hide.
"But...you're like, a DRAGON," Kim exclaimed. Her eyes were wide and she nudged Clark. "A dragon!" she hissed at her brother. He just shrugged.
"Yes, yes, I'm a dragon," said Frank, dusting himself off. "And you two are very noisy boys. What are your names?" he asked.
"BOYS?!" huffed Kim and crossed her arms indignantly. "I'm a GIRL."
"So sorry," said Frank. "How rude of me. I have such a difficult time telling the difference."
"It's fine," Kim said, with a wave of her hand. "I'm Kim and this is my brother Clark. And you're a freakin' DRAGON."
Frank sighed, closed his eyes, and rubbed his temples.
"Yes," he said. "I'm a dragon. But please, lower your voices. I don't particularly like attracting attention and as you can see, my house just exploded. I'm going to go stay at my old cave until I can get this sorted." He rummaged through his house rubble and eventually extracted a blanket and pillow, both covered in dust and bits of drywall.
"Can we come, too?" asked Kim.
"Uh," said Frank. "What?"
"Yeah, it'll be great!" shouted Clark. "We'll go home and tell our mom that we're spending the night at a friend's, and we'll pack some sandwiches and stuff to make s'mores and some hot dogs and it'll be so fun! We haven't been camping in forever!"
Frank scratched his beard and took a moment to think. He knew he didn't have any food at the cave and he didn't really want to spend the evening foraging for food. He wasn't sure he could convince a pizza place to make deliveries to the middle of the woods and he was awfully fond of s'mores. And maybe the tiny humans would provide good company, or at least some entertainmet. He was without his TV, after all.
"Fine, you can come," Frank said. Kim and Clark high-fived each other. Kim held up her hand for Frank to high-five but he stared at her blankly until she lowered it.
"OK, we'll be there soon...um, where is your cave?" asked Kim.
"There's only one cave in the woods. Have you seen it before?" Frank asked.
"Oh, yeah, we went there today," said Clark.
"Well, then," said Frank. "I think you know where to go. And remember, don't tell anyone. You wouldn't believe how many towns I've been run out just because of a little fire-breathing."
Kim and Clark's eyes both widened at the mention of fire-breathing. Both were hoping to see a demonstration of that later. They had to make the s'mores somehow.
Showing posts with label frank. Show all posts
Showing posts with label frank. Show all posts
Monday, August 2, 2010
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Frank, part 2
Frank's favorite part of the day was the late afternoon. It was usually quiet and he could concentrate on his stories. Each day, he recorded his soap operas and, once he got home from work, he would pour himself a glass of milk and settle into his favorite chair to catch up on the daily goings on.
You might think it strange that a dragon has a day job, but his duplex doesn't just pay for itself. Frank used to live out in the woods, in a cave actually, which is a pretty typical place to find a dragon. In fact, Kim and Clark had found the cave that Frank used to inhabit when they were on their dragon hunt and, had they looked a little closer, they would have found evidence in the form of old People magazines and Poptart wrappers (Frank could toast them himself, without the need for toasters or pesky electricity).
Eventually, Frank decided to move out of the cave to a place with indoor plumbing and soft beds and cable. Especially cable. Which meant he had to get a job. He found the perfect job at a firefighter training facility. At first they balked at hiring a dragon, mostly on the grounds that none of them actually believed in dragons, but Frank was now an integral part of the team. The Rowling City Fire Brigade was the most accomplished group of fire-putter-outers you could ever dream to find, all thanks to having a dragon on their side.
Once he'd procured employment, finding somewhere to live was easy. He decided on a small house at the end of a quiet road, close to the woods he'd once called home. He still had friends there that he liked to visit from time to time (under cloak of darkness, of course) and, as he was too big to fit in a car, needed to be within walking distance.
And so, jobbed and housed, Frank settled into a comfortable routine. He didn't know yet that his much beloved routine was about to be rudely disrupted, which is all the better for him, really, because Jake had just told Chastity that he was leaving her for another woman who turned out to be Chastity's long lost twin sister. You really need all of your concentration for a storyline of that kind.
Frank's concentration was interrupted by some shouting on his front lawn. He couldn't make out what was being said but it kept getting louder. His temper was rising, but he tried to calm himself. Not many people know this, but when a dragon gets too upset, they have absolutely no control over the whole fire-breathing thing. It's a real problem at dragon sporting events.
Frank was getting angrier and angrier as the yelling outside continued. He started pacing around his house and, unfortunately, his anger reached its most dangerous point as he entered his kitchen. He opened his mouth and let loose a great ball of fire, which flew directly at his stove. His gas stove. His gas stove that then exploded, taking the house with it.
Luckily, dragons can withstand a lot more than a mere house falling on them, so Frank was fine. Annoyed, but fine. Through the remnants of his house, he heard a tiny voice ask, "Did we do that?" He cleared his throat.
"No," he said. "I did." He tossed away the bricks and boards and blown up furniture and broke free of what was left of his house. And that's how he met Kim and Clark.
You might think it strange that a dragon has a day job, but his duplex doesn't just pay for itself. Frank used to live out in the woods, in a cave actually, which is a pretty typical place to find a dragon. In fact, Kim and Clark had found the cave that Frank used to inhabit when they were on their dragon hunt and, had they looked a little closer, they would have found evidence in the form of old People magazines and Poptart wrappers (Frank could toast them himself, without the need for toasters or pesky electricity).
Eventually, Frank decided to move out of the cave to a place with indoor plumbing and soft beds and cable. Especially cable. Which meant he had to get a job. He found the perfect job at a firefighter training facility. At first they balked at hiring a dragon, mostly on the grounds that none of them actually believed in dragons, but Frank was now an integral part of the team. The Rowling City Fire Brigade was the most accomplished group of fire-putter-outers you could ever dream to find, all thanks to having a dragon on their side.
Once he'd procured employment, finding somewhere to live was easy. He decided on a small house at the end of a quiet road, close to the woods he'd once called home. He still had friends there that he liked to visit from time to time (under cloak of darkness, of course) and, as he was too big to fit in a car, needed to be within walking distance.
And so, jobbed and housed, Frank settled into a comfortable routine. He didn't know yet that his much beloved routine was about to be rudely disrupted, which is all the better for him, really, because Jake had just told Chastity that he was leaving her for another woman who turned out to be Chastity's long lost twin sister. You really need all of your concentration for a storyline of that kind.
Frank's concentration was interrupted by some shouting on his front lawn. He couldn't make out what was being said but it kept getting louder. His temper was rising, but he tried to calm himself. Not many people know this, but when a dragon gets too upset, they have absolutely no control over the whole fire-breathing thing. It's a real problem at dragon sporting events.
Frank was getting angrier and angrier as the yelling outside continued. He started pacing around his house and, unfortunately, his anger reached its most dangerous point as he entered his kitchen. He opened his mouth and let loose a great ball of fire, which flew directly at his stove. His gas stove. His gas stove that then exploded, taking the house with it.
Luckily, dragons can withstand a lot more than a mere house falling on them, so Frank was fine. Annoyed, but fine. Through the remnants of his house, he heard a tiny voice ask, "Did we do that?" He cleared his throat.
"No," he said. "I did." He tossed away the bricks and boards and blown up furniture and broke free of what was left of his house. And that's how he met Kim and Clark.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Frank, part 1
When Kim and Clark went dragon-hunting, they never expected to actually find a dragon. They especially did not expect to find a dragon named Frank. They especially especially did not expect Frank to live in a duplex at the end of their street.
They didn't even find him while they were on their dragon hunt, although they had prepared for their hunt so carefully. They made sure to bring several different kinds of sandwiches (as they were not sure what kinds of sandwiches dragons prefer), some rope, and they'd even swiped a fire extinguisher, just in case they met a less-than-pleasant dragon.
As expected, however, they left their hunt empty-handed. They found their dragon when they were on their way home. And they didn't so much find him as he found them, wrestling on his front lawn.
They hadn't meant to wrestle but, being brother and sister, these things tend to happen. It doesn't matter how it happened, but let's just say the words "fartsniffer" and "buttgrabber" were thrown about.
Kim had just gotten the upper hand, as she often did, by virtue of being older, taller, and heavier. Clark was facedown on the ground, pouting into the dirt, and Kim was sitting gloriously atop his skinny back.
"Get...OFF," Clark said, shifting his weight from side to side and trying to dislodge his sister.
"Say it!" she shouted, and poked a wet finger in Clark's ear. He swatted her hand away and shook his head.
"I won't!"
"Saaaaay it..." she warned, readying another finger for a Wet Willie.
"FINE! I'M A PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!" Clark shouted and that's when the house in front of them exploded in a great roar of noise.
"Holy crap," said Kim. "Did we do that?"
"No," said a voice buried in the remains of the house. "I did."
Kim and Clark looked at each other. Kim stood up and helped her brother to his feet. They brushed themselves off and walked toward the pile of house in front of them.
And that's when a dragon emerged from the rubble.
They didn't even find him while they were on their dragon hunt, although they had prepared for their hunt so carefully. They made sure to bring several different kinds of sandwiches (as they were not sure what kinds of sandwiches dragons prefer), some rope, and they'd even swiped a fire extinguisher, just in case they met a less-than-pleasant dragon.
As expected, however, they left their hunt empty-handed. They found their dragon when they were on their way home. And they didn't so much find him as he found them, wrestling on his front lawn.
They hadn't meant to wrestle but, being brother and sister, these things tend to happen. It doesn't matter how it happened, but let's just say the words "fartsniffer" and "buttgrabber" were thrown about.
Kim had just gotten the upper hand, as she often did, by virtue of being older, taller, and heavier. Clark was facedown on the ground, pouting into the dirt, and Kim was sitting gloriously atop his skinny back.
"Get...OFF," Clark said, shifting his weight from side to side and trying to dislodge his sister.
"Say it!" she shouted, and poked a wet finger in Clark's ear. He swatted her hand away and shook his head.
"I won't!"
"Saaaaay it..." she warned, readying another finger for a Wet Willie.
"FINE! I'M A PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!" Clark shouted and that's when the house in front of them exploded in a great roar of noise.
"Holy crap," said Kim. "Did we do that?"
"No," said a voice buried in the remains of the house. "I did."
Kim and Clark looked at each other. Kim stood up and helped her brother to his feet. They brushed themselves off and walked toward the pile of house in front of them.
And that's when a dragon emerged from the rubble.
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